solarbird | (Reply)

From:

Thanks for the clarification: that is helpful.

I'm not terribly surprised by the lack of male response to those ads: I'm sure that their communicative dynamic is driven by a deeply-conditioned fear of looking weak or in some fashion un-male in the eyes of their imagined peer-group(s).

The example of the frown is indeed a good one, and something that is, here at least, so deeply-ingrained (right in there with the 'eww' vocalisation) that it slips recognition as being an element of behavioural change.

I do have to keep in mind the practical need to pick my fights; all the same, there is usually room for the situationally-appropriate behavioural encouragements, even if they are (most of the time) relegated to the status of secondary or lower communications objectives.

For what it may be worth, I do also see a difference between yielding my space and vacating a space which they may or may not have chosen to arrogate unto themselves -- I long since gave up on trying to inhabit the patriarchal space 24/7. That's not the same as separatism (although I did do that once); it's more about refusing to dignify some of their shitty behaviour, let alone being complicit in its social legitimation, by playing along in any way.

Given in the hopes that some of these words will make at least shards of sense; the topic is worthy of thought.